Nurture v. Nature
during break time at work we started having a discussion about whether homosexuality is something a person is born with or something they choose as an alternative to heterosexuality. Our discussion didn’t get too deep, nor were the arguments fully processed, before we had to get back to work, but i kept thinking of how to address the issue. In the end i decided on an analogy i felt was adequate:
A person’s taste in food. I personally hate pickles (and celery). This is how i was born, i didn’t acquire a distaste for them, nor have i been able to begin to like them. i just can’t stand these two foods. it is true that i CAN choose to eat them, or choose not to. But, i will always be uncomfortable when they are in my food. (i can’t begin to explain how disappointing my first bite into a burger is when i feel that snap of something that is not lettuce or tomato.) so that is the connection. A person CANNOT choose what attracts them, they cannot choose what gender they find appealing, or who turns them on. they can choose whether to act or not to act (we are not animals after all) but their orientation is not something that they develop consciously or unconsciously through culture and society.
it is true that because of culture or society a person may choose to hide their orientation, but that does not mean that they choose to be straight or gay. A homosexual person will always be uncomfortable in heterosexual relationships or in feigning a heterosexual orientation, but that does not mean they choose to be so. I can eat pickles or celery if i must, but it will not be a pleasant experience, i am not biologically geared to enjoy those foods, some people are, but i am not. likewise, some people are naturally attracted to the same sex or the opposite sex or both, but the most they have a choice over is whether to be comfortable with themselves and who they let others perceive them to be, or not. I choose to be happy, so i gladly admit that i hate pickles and i will continue to ask for “no pickles” on my orders. :)
do you agree?
